Time for some random bullet points! Let’s rock this funky joint.

Some news about Nonetheless – good news, for once. Firstly, you can now purchase our CD on iTunes! If you have an account, just sign in and search for Nonetheless or Despite the Stereotype (the CD title), and feel free to purchase 2049854 copies for you and the nation of Uruguay. You can also purchase individual songs for $0.99, which is equally awesome in nature. If you don’t have an iTunes account, you are living in the past and should be set aside like hand-crank phonographs and VHS copies of Highlander 2.

We have a gig! We got tired of waiting around for a great singer to show up, and decided that we are strong, we are powerful, we are woman (two of us are, at least), so we went ahead and booked a show at Skillman Street Pub in Dallas on September 13th. Since we’re without a lead singer, we’re gonna have our guitarist Trip singing, I’m singing, we’re having some guest appearances, and we’re even gonna let the crowd hop up there and belt out a song or two. And did I mention that it’s a FREE show? Free as in free? Bring your asses out if you’re in town. We’re doing an 18 song setlist, which is kinda like doing distance running with asthma for a band that hasn’t gigged since February. Come see us.

Speaking of not having a lead singer…we still don’t. But we’ve auditioned a guy who seems promising. He’s coming back out tonight for a second look. We’ve learned to make people sing for us at least twice if we like them, because even a blind squirrel can find a nut SOME days, and that initial audition can often be misleading. We had a guy come out last week who sounded decent, but when he returned on Tuesday, he couldn’t replicate that performance. It’s worth the extra effort, and if the person really wants to join the band, they’ll willingly come sing again. We had a singer once who was positively awesome in his audition, and we hired him on the spot, only to discover that he sounded like a bag of weasels being pulled over gravel by a 4-wheeler. Don’t worry, it’s a sturdy bag, and no weasels were harmed in the making of that analogy. Wish us luck on that front.

5YO starts kindergarten on Monday. My baby is growing up. It’s a really emotional moment for me, but not for the reason you might suspect. Sure, DWW is all misty-eyed about her baby going to Big Kid School, but I get choked up over the fact that our daycare costs will decrease by nearly $100 per WEEK now! Yes, per week. And that doesn’t count the additional costs (such as field trips and other activities) or the additional additional costs (such as 9YO and 5YO sticking their hands out for spending money when they go on the aforementioned field trips). Kids are expensive as all hell. We’re gonna save about $400 per month just by having him go to public school now. Damn, I’m tearing up right now thinking about it. Do you even know how much bacon that represents?

Here’s some pictures from my boy Bryan’s wedding I attended in June. I don’t have any crazy stories to tell about the trip, really, because all in all it was a good time with very little drama. That’s a good thing, but it makes for boring storytelling. Hence no separate blog post.

This is the van we rented for the trip. And yes – we rented. You may recall that my vehicle, the Jeep, has no air conditioning. Well, it DOES – but it conditions the air to be hot as hell, so that’s a no-go. DWW’s car is practically a Model-T, so that was not a viable option either. We went with this big brown box instead. Ignore the weeds growing in my driveway.

This is one of the things I really love and miss about old-school diner-type restaurants. What you see there up on the wall is the biggest menu known to man. This little place makes damn-near EVERYTHING! I think I could go in and ask for a bowl of unicorn horn soup, and the most they’d say is “We’ll bring it to your table”.

5YO and 9YO with their cousins, DWW’s brother’s kids. Adorable.

Bryan, the groom, mugging over the groom’s cake at the rehearsal dinner. See that bald head? Yeah, I’ve slapped it a time or two. Had to put him in his place. Bryan and I met at work11 years ago, and decided to start a band. We’ve been thick as thieves ever since. His poor, poor wife…she knows not what she has bought into.

The wedding rehearsal. Bryan’s up there with the faux-bride. As you know, it’s bad luck for the real bride to walk down the aisle before the actual wedding. I think the fear is that she’d think about what she’s actually doing, and run for the hills. Note that we’re outside at this point. The wedding took place at the home of the bride’s parents, which sat on a lovely piece of land out in the woods so deep that sunlight has to be faxed in. And was it hot, in South Carolina, in June, outside? Why yes, it was.

This is Chris. Chris is the epitome of awesome. Sure, he looks like Noel Gallagher from Oasis, but don’t let that deter you from his awesomeness. He’s the guitarist in Bryan’s band (my old band), and you see him here practicing “Canon in D”, a very traditional wedding piece. (And as an aside, check this YouTube video out for the most incredible anti-Canon in D rant ever. It’s worth it.) But Chris is a rocker. I very innocently asked him how hard it would be to slip in some hard rock tunes while he played that lovely music. You know, not all heavy and shit – after all, he’s only got an acoustic guitar – but just to play something that’s obviously hard rock, but play it sweetly. He resisted, but my generous offer of $5 swayed him to sneakin some classics such as “Stairway to Heaven”, “One” by Metallica,  and “Dream On” by Aerosmith into the playlist. It was funny as hell, trust.

Me, in my fly groomsman gear. Note the teal tie, set off by the teal vest and the long-sleeve white shirt. Note the sunglasses I wore, due to the sun beating down on me like prison guard during a riot. Note the lack of sweat, due to the fact that I had just wiped my head when I took this pic. The sweat returned instantaneously. It was a hot one, people.

White people doing the Cupid Shuffle. The two closest people in the picture were damned good, though. They obviously dance a lot, because they were putting in dips and spins and all kinds of Soul Train maneuvers out there, while the others were still trying to figure out which way to go when the song says “To the right, to the right, to the right, to the right!” And yes, the dance floor – such as it was – was also outside. When Bryan and his new bride nearly stumbled on the uneven floor during the couples’ dance, we groomsmen only laughed a little. Ok, I’m lying. We laughed a lot.

9YO with my mom and my grandma. We had an early birthday party for him while we were in town with family, and my peeps made the cross-state journey. If you count me, since I took the picture and all, that’s four generations of my family all in one spot. That’s pretty damn cool to me.

See than man, way in the back, bending over? Can you make out what his outfit looks like? You may need to click the picture to make it bigger. I’ll wait.

This man is no relation to me. I do not know him, I’ve never met him. But I barely suppressed the urge to tell him to stop dressing up in Osk Kosh B’Gosh for Men, because this ensemble looked like a Tim Burton crack-induced nightmare. Just…no. I actually circled him twice before finding a good spot to get this Secret Squirrel photograph. He literally looks like he fell asleep in the Crayola factory and fell into a vat of What The Hell.

Whew! All that blogging winded me. I’m out. I’ll let you know how the 2nd audition goes tonight. Cross your fingers, folks.